Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Blogs and Feelings and Such

I just read a blog post that made say aloud: Ditto. Ginny over at Small Things is writing about "hard times, pretty pictures."

Example of my photography skills. 

I do not say "Ditto" because I have experienced what Ginny is experiencing. Though she doesn't share what it is, I know that right now, in my life, things are going along rather "swimmingly", not so much "sinking-ly". So I am not posting the good as opposed to the hard times, or tragic or painful times. But maybe as opposed to the messy, embarrassing, or frustrating.
Example of kid photography skills.

One of the ways I see my blog is as a record of things for my kids to look back on. A snap shot of their childhood. I am not good at remembering to take pictures, and I am not a talented photographer, but I know how to write. And so I try to put into words what we are doing and thinking now. 

Cousin seen through fingers.

It is also a place to put down my thoughts, reactions, rants, musings...whatever. But I rarely share too much about the bad days. It isn't my style and doesn't help me deal better with them. 

Ginny says: 

And I guess I just need you to know that.  I post beauty, even when life is ugly.  For me, it’s the only way.

I see that in her blog. I admire that in her blog. And I am thankful for the reminder. 

Ginny also says: 

Blogs have a way of deceiving, but that’s only if you choose to read them that way.  It’s a choice.  You can read that I stopped for cherries, and make all sorts of assumptions, or you can simply be reminded that we all have our good moments–you and me. 

Again..."Yes Ginny, thank you for saying it." 

I know that there are some very beautiful blogs that I avoid because they make me feel---no---I choose to compare myself and then end up feeling bad, or stressed, or regretful. 

But I realize some people might have the same reaction to parts of my blog. And then I worry and think--should I be more real? Should I blog like Jen (whose words I love to read and chuckle at) about my life with kids. But I am not Jen. And she is not me. Nor am I Ginny

Finally, Ginny's blog post struck me with this line: 

I choose not to share the trials we face as parents here.  As our boys have gotten older, it has become far more obvious why it’s necessary that I don’t.  No matter the temptation to pour my heart out, this is the internet, and my heart is not the only one on the line.

I can see that my "funny kid stories" are increasingly only about the youngest, and that I am reluctant to share stories (even triumphs and good stuff) about the two older kids. 

Those are no longer only my stories to tell. As kids grow and become more self-aware those stories are entirely theirs. I may write about them in a more private setting, just to save the memory. But they don't go here anymore. 

More Kid Pictures: Puppy watches Cousin. 


  1. I read the same post you referred to today, and had some of the same thoughts. I feel the need to exclude so much, yet, also have the desire to express my thoughts, then wonder, what's next: private settings? Which I react with a "noooo," but still wonder what's the best way to express myself without potentially infringing on someone I love?

    The first pic is pretty cute, btw. :)

    1. I go back and forth too---private or public. I think "what's the best way" is probably an ongoing discernment.

      Cute pic--love the droopy tutus!

  2. I started blogging to get out of my "almost 30? When did that happen" mid-life- crisis....oh my gosh!....my life is half over. No. I refused to allow aging to take over and so I started recording life with pictures. In many cases, it forced me to stop and see all the blessings and happiness that I over look while searching for some bigger meaning or moment in life. Hence the journey of REasons for Chocolate began. I, too, agree on what I can or cannot blog about because of who's feelings are at stake. Sometimes, my kids would say, "all you do is blog about Stan or Clementine". Well, Stan is blogged about to show how wonderful adoption can be, hoping to encourage adoptive parents and birth mothers. Then there is the baby. Well, gosh! They must agree she is so much fun to blog about since they are so proud of their little baby sister. And they stop and realize how precious life is, each life, and reluctantly admit, it's okay to blog so much about a new baby! :) sometimes I have to blog about the ugly though. Just a little bit of it. I never want anyone to think my life is perfect. Cough. snort. Choke. It is anything but. I just like to keep looking at the blessings around me and remember to thank God above for them. Now...your pictures LOL! Girl, you have an amazing gift for writing. You so eloquently put into words what is on my heart. Sigh. Using our gifts that we were giving, to honor God, to remember the blessings and being grateful for them, that's what it's all about. :) Thank you for sharing the post!

    1. Thanks Patty! I so appreciate your comments on my blog---you have so encouraged me on this blogging journey.